Catarina Fernandez Castañón
March 07, 1926 – October 22, 2012
When I lost my brother Arturo, I used to say that the pain I experienced from his death was unimaginable. Although I knew that one day my parents would pass on, I was positive this kind of pain could get no worse. But I was wrong. First my father and father in law passed, and then my mother. But when my mother left this world, the pain I felt was like none other. After all, I was a part of her. A mother’s love is something that no one can explain; it is made of deep devotion, sacrifice and pain. It is never-ending, unselfish and enduring.
There is nothing that can destroy it or take that love away. I was with her when I entered this world and I was with her when she left it. We were part of each other. We were of the same flesh and blood from the day I was conceived. She is a part of me and I am a still a part of her. This was a mother and son bond that could never be broken, even after her death. The bond I have with her will never fail or falter, no matter how much my heart is breaking. As I mourn, I have realized that two good things have come from her passing. One is that that she is no longer suffering from that hideous disease of cancer. The other is being able to model myself after her as a kind, giving and sharing person.
I want to continue her legacy with no controversies and conflicts in my life. I want to live my life, with all the serenity, peace and love that she had, of which I covet so much, and this comes from the heart. As I write this post I liked to remember all the good times I shared with my mom. She was a wonderful mother, and every night before I go to sleep, I thank her for her unconditional love, for forgiving me when I did something wrong, for holding me when I could do no right, for being at my side when I needed her the most and for throwing me kisses until the day she went to heaven.
I cherished every moment of my childhood days with her and I thank her for staying awake at night with me when I used to fall sick. What a beautiful thing. What a beautiful woman. I was fortunate to have her this long and I am proud to say she was my mother. She glows with all the beauty of the rarest of brightest gems. It is far beyond defining, and defies all explanation. But it’s a bond that will never be broken until the day I die and we meet again. Love you Mother. We are, but one.
Robert Castanon Jr
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